Mind Change

This is a shameless plug for a new element on the website--Tom Jones' new website and service called "mind change," an effort to make practical the Romans 12 encouragement that we be transformed by "the renewing of our minds."

When I was younger, I read copious quantities of scripture, spiritual books, and commentaries. As I've aged (like good wine or bad cheese? Hmm), I have found that my actual ability to put into practice what I've read is almost miraculously poor! A little goes a long way. So now, in addition to whatever book in the Bible I'm studying, I also read "a Psalm a day," just to get that "one thought" I can use for Today.

The "Mind change" effort is similar. Give it a try. Tom and his wife Sheila have a way of putting things simply, poetically, and memorably--good spiritual thoughts to help you anchor your week.

A Thought On Vicarious Living

Last week, Stephen graduated from Lakeside School on a beautiful sunny day. The night before he and his friend Tony were the finale act at Baccalaureate--an amazing performance I must say as a biased parent. After graduation, we had a party at our house with some best friends coming over to congratulate Stephen and meet the grandparents. All of it filled me with awe.

This week I have wondered whether or not that is a good thing--to continue to look to one's children for "inspiration." I have been blessed to live around sources of great inspiration all my adult life--from the college Boston years, to Hong Kong, to the church here in Seattle. The child-raising years have been equally inspiring: little kids are full of charm and make you feel warm inside at the end of the day. It's magical. And older teens bring you to the brink of thrilling vicarious living (a cliche I thought I could avoid) as you witness their sports competitions, their acts on stage, their academic achievements, etc.

But is it likely that they will, by dint of their college exploits, or by the first job they hold, or by whatever convictions they evolve, continue to fill you, the parent, with "inspiration"? I think this puts terrible and unwarranted pressure on them, and paints us, the parents, into a corner of limited meaning. The kids' lives are tempting, but I think we have to look first back to the life of God, and to His thoughts, His ways, His deeds, His plans for inspiration. We have our own individual journeys to complete with Him, and He promises that the journey will be inspiring indeed.

In a good way, let's leave the kids out of it.

The Truth About How Your Teens Are Doing

Raising teens is confusing. Run, don't walk, away from any parent that denies this! Probably even your teens would admit it. With this in mind, if "it takes a village" to raise a child, imagine how easy it is for the village to be thrown into confusion. It's parallel to the catchphrase, "too many cooks in the kitchen." How is your teen "doing?" Ask their parents. Ask a teen worker or big brother/big sister. Ask the ministry staff. Ask your teen. Don't be surprised if you find the recipe a bit garbled, because each cook brings a different snapshot to the table (to blend metaphors just to see if you're paying attention).

The Green family has been so blessed with good cooks--Ron and Linda, the Whits, Ben Richey, Haily Rose, Megan, Landon, the Kellys, Mack and Mike--and many others too hard to list and thank. We are proud of our kids--their own journeys, their struggles and triumphs, their character & courage--and proud of the village.

But here's a note to villagers: don't second-guess each other. Share your snapshots, pray, and keep serving. But don't use your snapshots to sketch portraits of one another--it's a losing recipe. Teen workers will be tempted to make deductions about the parents themselves instead of about the teen. Parents will be tempted to make deductions about the teen workers instead of about the teen. Satan wants the villagers to "find the root" of teens' problems not in the teen's heart, but in one another (quite a ruse!): "If only the teen workers would_____ my teen would love God more," etc., etc. "If only that parent would ____ it would change the heart of this teen," etc., etc.

Of course, parents, if you're an actual witness to something between a teen worker and your teen that doesn't sit right, go talk about it. Similarly, teen workers, if you're an actual witness to something between a parent and the teen, go ask about it. That's our role as disciples.

What about defensiveness? My view is this--if you're a parent, you should defend the teen workers and their efforts when talking to your teen (if that teen is nonplussed or critical). This is something we have vigorously striven to do. Similarly, if you're a teen worker, defend the parents when talking to the teen. This teaches the teenagers that someone else is NOT the reason for their problems.

In the end, young mentors and parents have some good and godly influence on the teens, but it is overwhelmingly up to the teen him or herself to make their choice for God. With love, gentleness, and encouragement, let's keep putting that responsibility where it belongs.

9 days until my wedding

As I write this blog, my head is literally spinning from all the things surrounding my wedding on June 16th. For anyone who has already planned a wedding, I have nothing but respect and honor for what you did. I can’t wait to get married! Anyway, I started off the day writing the midweek lesson tonight for all the college students and Single professionals within the greater Tacoma area of the church. God has recently blessed our ministry with a lot of visitors lately and I thought it would be good for us to do a lesson on sacrifice in order to focus on what it was going to take from this group to grow for the future.

After finishing writing the lesson, I prayed and then went over to Tacoma Community College to read and share my faith. Although it was sunny, the weather outside was still a bit windy. Mostly all the people I met didn’t seem interested in coming out to Bibletalk except this one guy I met named Judd. It was interesting because after he initially informed me that he was already going to a church, he started to ask me about the structure of our group and wrote down my cell number on a church card that I gave him. I pray that he will be open to studying the bible and build a relationship with me.

After sharing for a while, I went to the library and finished reading a premarital counseling book that the evangelist of the South Sound Church of Christ, Daren Overstreet, suggested I read. After reading, I drove to Pacific Lutheran University (PLU) to share my faith with a girl in my campus ministry named Carla Gilmore. Carla just got baptized a few months ago and has already set the pace for faith in our group. Despite our fervor to share, by summer classes just starting a PLU (which already has a small number of students even during the school year not to mention even less during the summer), we were only able to meet two people on campus. However Carla and I both agreed that we would keep coming each week to share with anyone available on campus.

Next, I went back to my house, ate some lunch, and then had a counseling appointment with a single brother in the church. After the appointment, I talked to my roommate for a while, and then I met with my financee, Naomi Eberly, so that we could go over the details of our wedding/wedding reception coming up.

We finished all of our wedding planning just in time for midweek at 7:30pm. Everyone responded well to my lesson about sacrifice which of we all know (that being sacrifice) is not an easy thing to do. After fellowshipping for a while, I got a ride back to my house, started to revise the schedule for Teen Camp, and then talked to one of my best friend’s, Jafar Skinner, about married life before I started to write this blog. These 9 days cannot go fast enough! I hope to see you at my wedding…

-Marcus Wallace

U-N-I-T-Y

(Psalm 133:1)
“How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!"

The North Men had a camping trip that left us all refreshed and inspired. We enjoyed the beauty of God’s creation out on Camano Island, which is set along the Puget Sound.

Even though it was only an ‘overnight’ trip, it felt like an eternity of fellowship, fun and food….Oh, and fire! We did a little jump and dancing through the camp fire which added some adventure to our time. I was glad no one caught on fire. The weekend started on Friday night. We ate dinner together and sat around the fire telling stories of faith and sharing our past, present situations and some of our future goals. On Saturday morning, we ate breakfast together and went out in small groups to pray together. It was great to hear the prayers of my brothers and to be out along the Puget Sound hearing the waves and seeing the birds fly by.

We enjoyed a rock skipping contest and “baserock” another name for baseball. It was a blast. All the men were not able to make it, but we are planning on having a North Men’s camping three times a year so there will be other opportunities for those who could not be there this time.

It is good for brothers to live together in unity, because when we do, we are refreshed and inspired by God and one another.

Time Away Ordering My Private World, by Jay Kelly

What a time away with God does for me is hard to describe. Last Thursday and Friday I finally had a little getaway with God that I’ve been trying to schedule since December.

Taking the Edmonds/Kingston ferry in my pickup with a 40 pound backpack riding shotgun is a little glimpse of heaven. Driving to the Pacific coast gives me hours to unwind. There isn’t any radio station or cell phone reception once I pass Port Angeles and head into the Olympic National Forest. The forested areas are so thick and dark in the daytime that headlights must be on for safety. I prayed for each of the members of our ministry by name during the drive. I finally get to the Ranger Station at Lake Ozette and sign in. I get my bear-proof food container; I note the cougar confrontation warning signs, roll my eyes and head toward the coastal camping area.



The perfect camping spot was waiting for me on a grassy bluff about four feet above the beach with a perfect sunset view of the horizon with the waves crashing. I got set up and hopped in my hammock with my new favorite book, Ordering Your Private World by Gordon MacDonald. The author challenges our society’s trend toward honoring the most tired and “driven” among us regardless of the state of their inner private world. He asks the question, “How did we get to a day when stress and fatigue are almost a badge of success?”

He warns that outward success with inner neglect is like the ground deep under your feet being eroded by underground water movement. One day out of the blue a giant sinkhole can appear and swallow up everything that had been built upon that area. The bedrock of our lives is only as solid as the health of our hearts. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”

I felt called out, understood and challenged as the writer shared about his own life and how he deepened his private world in very practical ways. I’m only a few chapters into the book, but I’m excitedly writing in my journal again and praying more. I look forward to finishing the book and making some decisions that will help me find a depth and soulfulness to daily living that I have not known with any consistency.